It is hard to describe how stupid it feels to set up a blog, write a blog, post a blog and then not be able to find your way back. I had to get help! Whew! One would think a semi- intelligent person could master the task of a blog. Especially considering that there are some less than intelligent people writing them successfully.
I have written a lot in my life. In high school, I wrote pages and pages to whomever. It was the way I worked through problems, told people what I thought when I did not have the courage to tell them. I would sit in bed and write, hide the pages, read them later a few times, then tear then up. I never sent them. When my parents were arguing, which felt like all the time, I'd stuff a pillow in the heat register in that old farm house to try to block out the noise from rising to the upstairs. Then I'd write. Then I'd tear it all up.
Now, there is email. A much less safe medium. You can say things so quickly, hit send and there is no tearing that up! It took awhile to get it through my head to never email when I am mad, upset, or especially if i have had anything to drink!!!! Lessons learned. Darn, I'm a slow learner.
Now, I fear writing for a number of reasons. One is work. I can not write anything that could ever reflect negatively on my employer or related things. I also rather fear letting anyone really know me, except my family and closest of friends. People make assumptions about who a person really is inside based on the initials behind their name. How truly stupid that is, but it is the way of the world. People choose to assume the worst rather than assume the best.
Is blogging the new-age therapy?
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